Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Photos: With Joe Shin at Prescott Corvette Show

I've been having some trouble lately, going through a lot so Shin wished we spend some time together Saturday morning. We enjoyed a Wafflehouse breakfast and took a lovely drive up to Prescott where we happened into a Corvette show near a commons, park area.

Tree & Bench.

WWI Statue, it took some effort to get a shot with the flags alive.
Fellow enjoyers of the park.
Tasty!
He thinks he's so cool, cocky punk.
Me, just hopping into my ride.
”$75 for a complete 40-volume set of The Yale Shakspeare“, maybe next time.
Joe, Me & Supergirl spotted in the background.
[View rest of album]

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Photos: Small Group goes to White Mountains


Guys and Dogs [Elliot, Shin, Louie]


Roadside Photo Op [Self, Shin, Louie, Chong-O* (not liable for inaccurate spelling)]


Check out the whole album!

A truly breathtaking weekend spent with nature.

peace,
~Dixon

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Domestic Situation

All my life I've had difficulty sleeping at night, started as child and continued on through my adulthood. The bouts with sound sleep arrive in waves; it comes and goes, I again find myself in the mid of a now week long stretch of sub 3 hours per night. I keep a little flip book log for myself, in the morning I record the hours slept (an estimate of what digits I can't recall having seen on my alarm clock) over the hours attempted - time spent laying there. My little red book has a string of 2/6’s and 3/6’s dating back to April 30th.

I have a quiet routine I go through to wind down my night; I keep myself pretty mellow for the half hour or so leading up to when I lie in bed. I used to take an over the counter sleep aid, whether effective as placebo, by its active ingredients or ineffective entirely I'm not aware. I have known one technique to provide a sound and comforting rest every time I use it however - my fantasy domestic life.

I have a little home that hasn’t been built, neatly tucked away in a bit of a forest that can’t be found, nurtured by a lovely little lady that doesn't exist at the relational capacity I hold her in - I do just that too, holding her I rest.

The home has been a work in progress since 2002, back then it was just a studio apartment with a bare wooden floor I would imagine myself dancing across. Over the years I used this safety zone to experience and express my personality traits I was too afraid to dawn in the light. Much love has been tracked across those bare wooden floorboards as the home grew from an apartment to a house, single room and bath to two bedroom, two baths, full kitchen, laundry, patio, car port/over hang. Dinning with friends, talks by a garden fire pit, movie screenings, dance parties - home events I invite real life friends into, a place to calm me.

Here I have a future, potential to grow, validation, acceptance. A place of rest.

I have struggled with it, how I came to bring into this love of mine a living person who I do have a real relationship with - it was a long fought battle, often going back on my word as to being 'OK' with doing so. I recognized when I began "I don't want this, but I find nothing else, it's not forever, I'll be alright". Now it is time to stop. Now I want to use God.

In Desire, John Eldredge quotes Thomas à Kempis:


“There is nothing created that can fully satisfy my desires. Make me one with You in a sure bond of heavenly love, for You alone are sufficient to Your lover, and without You all things are vain and of no substance.”

It has been difficult, I didn’t realize how integrated into my life and emotions this domestic situation had become, without an imaginary warmth of love wrapping me at night my hours slept drop from a healthy six to the at-best three I get now.

I have faith however, and find my rest in knowing God is with me.

peace,
~Dixon

Photos: Small Group

Last group prior to Louie's move. Bye Louie's old home ;(

Back: Shin, Louie. Seated: Andre, Ludlum, me ;), Elliot. (Not Present: Brad)


I love you guys!

peace,
~Dixon

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Photos: Matsuri, Poet bar & Gordon Beirsch

Saturday afternoon Matsuri
From 02-23-08 Mats...

Saturday night Poet Bar & Brewery
From 02-23-08 Nigh...


Had a great Saturday guys!

peace,
~Dixon

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Moving Ducks


I'll always remember those early summer mornings, fighting you for the pool. [More Ducks Here]

I've moved, not too far but to a much better environment for me; real laid back couple, it's going to be so great for me. I've looked forward to moving for too long now. I'll take it slow and smoothly adjust to living with more healthy people, emotionally.

Their place is great, looking forward to hosting dinner partys here, the kitchen flows out to more-or-less one large area...oh the possibilities.

Joe, Scott, Doug - Thanks for all the help!

peace,
~Dixon

Friday, January 11, 2008

Searching for my platonic dance partner...

School starts next week, I'm excited, still working away at an associates - my 'exploration' time, time to find what will tide my days and finances until I more-or-less retire into teaching. Been moving around, dancing a bit more, I sneak off if the social thing starts dying down, find a shadowed corner and wiggle around; I'm pretty sure I'm not actually dancing per-se, however I found myself at a loss of words to justly articulate the thing I am doing.

I'm longing for someone to just move around with, I have a couple people in mind as possibilities but our relationships are so fledging, how do you walk up to someone and ask...'Hey, wanna be my platonic dance partner?'

The search continues...